My Personal Reminder

Just a personal reminder to myself..  hopefully one day to look back at this and think “Wow, I can’t believe I used to look like that and thought it was okay at that time.” My body has gone through some crazy changes in these past few years.

Just to prove my point, this is a quick summary of my weight fluctuations throughout these years.

This was how I used to look in 2009 (45 kg). Then, I could eat whatever I want and hardly gained any weight. I seldom exercised, ate unhealthily and was actually, quite proud of it.

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Towards the end of 2010, I started becoming more chubby (51kg)-picture below-. I became more meaty and started having a tummy. I stopped having the -eat all I want and never get fat- syndrome and started showing signs of being human. Whatever I ate started to show.

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After my chubby tale, I finished high school and it was time to start college. I did not like the idea of starting college being the plump kid and wanted to start with a “good impression”. So I starved myself, skipped breakfast and lost weight fast. This is a very unhealthy way to lose weight but then, I didn’t care. In early 2011, I started college looking like the pictures below ( 48 kg). I was definitely smaller in size and less chubby but this wasn’t a lifestyle I could sustain.

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Despite me losing weight fast, I couldn’t keep up with not eating breakfast and fasting all the time. I had to give in at some point. And although I started exercising with sports like muay thai, capoeira and salsa, my unhealthy habits and late nights started showing on my body. Have you heard how your body keeps the most accurate journal of what you do to it? Late 2011 ( 53kg) : As you can observe below, I started gaining fats at the sides of my waist and I became significantly more chubby. It is a curse how the first few areas where I gain weight is at my face.. oh my chubby cheeks 😦

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Although this may not be a dramatic change for some people but it’s not a good change and I was extremely unhappy about it.

So, towards the end of 2011, I joined a gym (Fitness First Empire Subang ) to start my year 2012 with new resolutions : towards a fitter and healthier body. My new year resolution for 2012 was to look fit and fit in my old jeans well. I kicked off the year 2012 pretty well.  I was recording my diet, watching what I ate and going to the gym for group exercise classes every other day. I started lifting weights for the first time. I looked through my whole photo album and I couldn’t really find a decent picture. But this was me earlier this year weighing 52 kg. Although I lost only 1 kg compared to a few months ago, I started weight training so bear in mind muscle weighs more than fat.

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So, you could say.. everything was going well. But what happened? I got complacent. I got lazy and tired of my routines. When your mind has decided on something like that, you know you’re going to do a half ass job… with your life. After completing my A-Levels examinations, with all that spare time at hand before heading off to university, instead of making use of this perfect opportunity to engage in more activities to keep fit or work on my diet, I started becoming lazy. I slept at wee hours in the morning and woke up in the afternoon.

My eating habits were terrible. I never realized how bad it was although Nick kept pointing it out. I always thought I was doing a good job because sometimes I ate a salad or had no sauce in my Subway sandwich. I felt like I was doing a significant thing in my diet. ‘Just 1 kuih bahulu‘ turned out to be ‘Aw man, I just finished the whole packet…‘.  The extra 10 lbs didn’t show up immediately of course. My jeans started to feel tight again and uncomfortable and then I realized it felt better to leave it unbuttoned after a while.The signs of trouble. ALWAYS.TAKE.NOTE!

How’d I solve it? Instead of working towards fitting the old pair, I bought new jeans to bring with me to London. I don’t have a weighing scale in London and rarely do I ever weigh myself but when I finally stepped into the gym in London, I became curious. And yeah, that’s how I found out. It was almost like finding out you’re pregnant (no, I’ve never actually experienced this but I would think it’d be similar emotion). I measured my body fat percentage as well. And I couldn’t believe it.

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This is what has become of me ( 57 kg) when I stepped foot in London. 5 kg in just five months. Yea, I can try to console myself and claim it’s an unflattering shot, bad angle, bad cameraman.. blame everyone else and forever looking like this or progressively look even worse in time. But enough with the oh-my-god-I-can’t-believe-this-is-happening. Bottom line is, this is bad. It might be acceptable to some…. well who am I kidding? No one should find this acceptable when you know this is simply due to laziness in exercise and diet. I am so humiliated even to upload this picture on a public blog. But this has to be done as a personal reminder to myself that I never wish to look like this ever again.

It has been two months since I got to London. About one month plus since I started actively working out and watching my diet. And this time my lifestyle is doable, it’s healthy and hopefully will lead to better results. Fingers crossed.

I go to the gym twice a week nowadays and am halfway to completing my 30 Day Bikram Yoga Challenge. I’ve not taken a picture of my whole body since the last horrible picture above. And I’m saving it for my next reality check when I touch down in Malaysia 2 weeks from now. My body has been going through some crazy changes throughout these years and this time, I’m taking control of it and putting an end to all these nonsense. My new year resolution to look fit hasn’t been working out the way I hoped for it to go but the year has not come to an end. I have officially one more month to do the best I can to take control of my body.

Well… I’m starting to feel a lot better with all my new habits. But I don’t exactly know whether I’m showing any significant physical progress. I look at myself in the mirror everyday and I can’t really tell the difference until I take a picture and compare with the previous one. So, next picture in two weeks. Wish me luck!

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One comment

  1. Good luck!

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